How to Avoid Dog Poop on Hoboken Sidewalks

Posted on 12. Mar, 2009 in Essentials

As I stroll down east of Hoboken to begin my morning commute, I’m usually greeted by nuggets of dog feces in all different colors, shapes and sizes, either nestled on the once poop-free pavement or camouflaged on the green grass. At first, it didn’t bother me as much. Then it had to happen. I noticed a faint smell of dog poop, looked down and realized my sneaker soles were covered with doo doo. It was a life-changing moment and from that day forward, I swore to myself it would never happen again. Here’s my simple guide for surviving these dangerous minefields.

THE MISTAKE

Hoboken is a beautiful city and when we walk around town, the last thing we usually pay attention to is the ground. But that’s where we all make a mistake.

Dog Poop Diagram 1

When we walk, we’re usually looking straight ahead or in different directions, but all in the same line of sight, giving us no visibility to what we might be stepping on. As you can see in the diagram above, the man is looking forward in one direction and at some point in time, he’ll probably be distracted by some attractive woman walking by, when all of a sudden the bottom of his shoes hits a “land mine”. It’s essential that we pay attention to what’s on the ground at all times, especially within any high-risk zones that you’re familiar with. For me, my high-risk zones are nearby sidewalks that have a combination of both pavement and grass. Dogs usually like to deficate on grass areas, but from time to time, they’ll make sure the sidewalk pavements don’t get lonely.

PAY ATTENTION

When I’m about to enter a dangerous minefield of dog poop, I’ve learned to put my mind into surveillance mode. It doesn’t take a lot of time to master. But from my experience, the toughest part is being able to avoid distractions and maintain that focus.

Dog Poop Diagram 2

By studying the diagram above, you can see that the man’s line of sight is solely concentrated on scanning the ground for dog poop. It’s similar to driving, where you want to be able to see everything in plain view across the landscape. Once the man has spotted his target or targets, he does a quick analysis of the size and radius and carefully plans how he will maneuver past the land mine. There are three standard maneuver options that I recommend:

1. Walk-overs: A popular maneuver, best for small land mines, has a high risk of contact
2. Walk-arounds: Another popular option, best for larger land mines, has the lowest risk of contact
3. Jump-overs: Risky move but is only recommend when there is a spread of multiple land mines

NIGHT SURVEILLANCE

Almost every night on my way back home from work, I approach a few dimly lit streets. This becomes a tough situation because I have zero visibility on the old and potential fresh land mines.

Dog Poop Diagram 3

Since I can’t afford night vision goggles, I use my iPhone as a light source to illuminate my path and spot my targets. I recommend iPhones because they can get pretty bright, but for other mobile devices, this advice might not be as useful. If you really want to avoid the poop, try a different walking route back home. It may take longer, but at least it will keep your shoes clean.

PICK UP THE POOP

Now it would only be fair if I discussed the other end of the stick as well. It’s one thing to avoid stepping on dog poop, but there’s only one way to avoid it entirely. And this is truly dependent on the responsibility of the dog owners out there! I know your dog’s poop smells but do us all a favor, pick it up and keep this city clean and disease-free. A single gram of pet waste contains an average of 23 million fecal coliform bacteria, some of which can cause disease in humans. Yup! It’s true.

Dog Poop Diagram 4

Each dog owner has their own system of picking up their dog’s poop. Being a dog owner most of my life, I came up with a simple 4 Step Guide for the new and experienced. The diagram above shows my simple breakdown.

1. Step 1: Pull 2 plastic bags out and double it, with one bag inside the other.
2. Step 2: Place your hand inside the bag. Don’t worry, your hand will be safe.
3. Step 3: Place your bagged hand on top of the pile of excrement and grab the poop. Take your free hand and grab the open end of the bag. Pull down turning the bag inside out.
4. Step 4: Tie the bag in a knot and throw it out to the closest garbage can.

Still don’t feel comfortable touching the poop? Go buy a pooper scooper. Here are some local Hoboken pet shops where you can purchase one:

Cornerstone Pets located 105 Ninth Street, Hoboken (between Washington & Bloomfield Sts.)
Beowoof located 106 Fifth Street, Hoboken (between Washington & Bloomfield Sts.)

FINAL WORDS

There’s so much dog poop in Hoboken, should we just give in, poke fun and make art like the Sprinkle Brigade in NYC?

In any case, I leave all all Hoboken dog owners with this message! The Hoboken Guy says:

Don’t be lazy! Pick up your dog’s poop!

And to all my fellow Hobokenites out there, good luck and look out where you’re going, will ya?

Tags: dogs, guide, poop